This week has been absolutely appalling. I'm not sure where time has gone but it's already Friday and I don't remember what I've done in the last four days; the only thing I do know is that I have not done any exercise at all.
I believe on Tuesday I spent all day shopping for a friend's birthday present and somehow just didn't muster up any energy to work out. Wednesday was a completely booked day and today I just somehow did not have the time. I still have the rest of the week to repent but tomorrow is out of the question and now I'm left with Saturday and the day of rest, Sunday. I'm not sure what to make of this but I do know the lack of exercise is making me feel sick. I'm not only getting sleepless nights but suddenly my bowel movements have changed and I'm beginning to feel lethargic Considering all this and my period, which should be coming any minute now (why is it so late?!), I'll be lucky to lose any weight this week.
Still, I have to stay as positive as possible. My eating has not been too bad and I've remained vegan and eaten sensibly (it's hard not to on The Kind Diet). I'm trying to add in even more greens to my diet and really trying my best to cut down on the soya and gluten this week because I have not been exercising. Needless to say it's been a difficult week and I've eaten a lot of white rice which has not been great for the stomach (or energy levels). I'm finding that I am snacking on a lot of bread and peanut butter - I really need to get a grip.
All of this is seemingly depressing and I really don't want to dwell on it too much. Tomorrow is another day and I know I'm being highly critical. Compared to the many mistakes I've made previously and the blunders of my old lifestyle, I'm living like a saint so I should really be giving myself a pat on the back. I just wish everyday could be perfect but that's just not reality, baby!
The topic of 'reality' brings me onto something that has been on my mind since Wednesday evening. Wednesday, being my best friend's birthday dinner, was a great opportunity to catch up with my friends and reveal my latest body for the first time in front of them. I received some really lovely comments and the inevitable conversation of my diet and diets in general cropped up at the dinner table.
It was ever so slightly awkward when I eventually had to pop in the news that I had recently turned vegan. There were a mixture of reactions all ranging from curiosity and what I perceived to be *roll my eyes* reactions. I am not, for one moment, saying that my friends are judgemental but I guess having done this more than once in my life, you do begin to get a bit defensive. The moment it came out, the jokes about failed vegetarian friends began and it was a mixture of laughter and bewilderment on my part. For the most part my friends were incredibly accepting, encouraging and lovely. I totally understood why some people could not understand the concept of 'mock meat' and that's just a whole other can of worms.
The night went on and the conversation moved from veganism to lifestyle choices. Previously I had said that what I'm doing isn't a diet but merely a lifestyle change; my intelligent friends agreed, giving me peace in my heart knowing that I wasn't going mad. However a friend, who is also going through 'lifestyle changes', said something that was incredibly thought provoking.
He declared that life is for living and that it was pointless to live miserably until you're 100 years old nibbling on leaves. I found this particularly shocking because this is the same friend who I had managed to inadvertently inspire to eat more vegetables and start running. I watched him as he shovelled meat, after bread, after fried good and after cake and wondered how much of that was true.
It's fair to say that no one wants to live life trapped under rules and regulations. This is exactly why I've always said the first step to freedom is by letting go and by changing your mindset. What boggles my mind is that this is the same friend who said out loud that he wanted to eat more 'raw' and become healthier. Is he confused? I'm pretty sure but what I do know is that he is a living example of why I decided to step over to the brighter side because I no longer wanted to be neither here nor there with my morals and values.
Continuing on the subject, there are a few points yet to be made. Many, many people live life 'to the fullest' by eating rubbish and treating their bodies like a trash can only to pay for it in the early endings of their lives'. If that isn't one of life's biggest paradoxes then I don't know what is. A particularly clued-in friend of mine agreed with me that the last thing you would want in a 'full life' is to have a painful and scary heart attack as your last memory. What is life when treating your body badly inhibits everything you do?
Needless to say the friend had little to say at the end of that conversation and I'm still very confident that what I said was completely true and more than a matter of my opinion. It seems, it was a general consensus.
While I haven't exercised my body, I have definitely exercised my mind this week. Today I had another conversation about the ethical reasons behind eating animals with my vegetarian Sister and this is another conversation worth talking about another time. For now I want to leave you with a final thought:
We are blessed with the lives that we live and we are given the divine right to live it the way we want to. Living life is not just about yourself, but it is about those around you and everyone that is affected by your existence. By choosing to harm your body is to live selfishly and the impact of your health affects others a lot more than you could imagine. If you have the choice, then make it a good one, one that will allow you to step up a level in life and allow you to lift others up with you.